This is something a bit quick and different, since I reckon not enough of you know what absolute legends you are. Which is a total travesty, to be honest. How can you not know??! I decided recently to find more ways of making the people around me realise how awesome they are. So I guess this is all part of Phase 1 of the evil lovely plan.
How to Draw a Legend
If you follow me on twitter (@bruceonlybruce) then you may have noticed I started playing around making videos on my phone recently. I doubt it’s going to become a thing, but it’s been fun so far. One such video is the one below, detailing in five minutes how to draw a legend.
I made it late at night, and then kind of forgot about it and didn’t share it anywhere, yet somehow the following morning I woke up to this tweet from Peet. A Peet Tweet, if you will.
Confused, I rewatched the video and found that on some unscripted whim at the end, I had stated that anyone who tweets me their drawing of a legend will have it rated out of 7.
It was an excellent drawing so I held my sleepy word and gave it a solid 1,968,002 out of 7.
It’s a bit embarrassing asking people to participate in things, so I wouldn’t usually have done anything like this, but then I thought to myself… well, if the people wanna draw legends then let them draw legends!
And so they did.
This blog post is a showcase of the legends each of these legends saw in the magical mirrors of Legend Seeing. It is a showcase of legends, a legendary showcase.
The Legends
The next legend to jump on board was Chris, who scored a whopping 1,880,098 out of 7.
Adding the first splash of colour to the showcase, Heather scored a legendary 1,972,500 out of 7!
This ‘cubist’ entry from Stu got an astonishing 1,891,776 out of 7!
The new colourful hair trend was picked up by Wicked Witch of the test, whose non-twitter name I have somehow never got round to finding out. This won her a wicked 1,988,021 out of 7!
Then with excellent technique, we got Beth’s green legend. The judge is not at all biased towards legends depicted with green hair. Beth scored a fantabulous 1,899,993 out of 7 for this dazzling drawing of a legend.
Simon can be forgiven for not drawing a legend with long colourful hair, but not for drawing eyes behind the glasses, which we all know is scientifically impossible. I’ve watched enough anime to know this. So Simon unfortunately only scored a magnificent 1,767,902 out of 7!
With no inconsistency or favouritism at all, the next drawing of a legend from Shey also showed eyes behind glasses, yet scored a formidable 1,890,916 out of 7!
Jam is the legendary artist who has purchased the largest number of beers for me in the past – who I also showed 0 favouritism for whatsoever – and he scored an exceptional 1,855,655 out of 7 out of 10!
This is where things started to get interesting, because the legend that is Sanne climbed into the ring! Sanne’s drawing of a legend was the first to reach the two million mark, with a monumental 2,000,033 out of 7! No one knows if this is actually a good thing or not, because trying to understand a rating system created by Bruce is like trying to understand… uhm, something relatively straightforward, really.
I was momentarily excited that the cricketer Viv Richards had drawn a legen- just kidding, I have no idea who that is. I definitely know who Viv the not cricketer is though, and they’re totally a legend! Their drawn legend was also excellent, so it scored a stellar 1,901,902 out of 7!
Side note: I found it very stressful trying to come up with numbers. Also I’ve started using different adjectives before everyone’s score now and I can’t think of any more. What a disaster. I’ll stare at this paragraph until more occur to me.
Ok, I’m ready. Let’s continue!
Swanny is twice the legend for drawing another legend other than her own legend, though arguably her son is her legend as well. It’s all very confusing. Swanny’s wonderful legend of a son scored a terrific 2,001,977 out of 7!
Ixchel upped the game further with this adorable croissant-eating legend in a bear hat I cannot look away from. Seriously, I’m trapped, someone send help. This drawing of a legend scored a sensational 1,999,982 out of 7!
Then Swanny returned for round 2 with her own legend! Again, no bias at all from my love of Swanny or the fact we are scholarship buddies, and she got a magical 2,001,308 out of 7 for that ombre!
Last, but most certainly never least, we have the legend that is Ady Stokes – and his legend. With those slightly wonky glasses, it was like looking at myself in the mirror (broke my nose playing rugby and my glasses have never sat straight), but of course this is a drawing of another total f’ing legend. Ady scored an epic 1,911,811 out of 7!
Did you see what I did there with the elevens? Because Ady is a master of accessibility!
Oh. And not because anyone would need to call the police. Didn’t think of that. Anyway!
The Exit
Hope you enjoyed this quick little gallery tour of legends. The offer is still up for anyone else who might want to draw a TFL (Total F’ing Legend). I will judge out of 7, with no favouritism or bias at all, as you have already seen.
And this was not at all an attempt to see if I can get my average blog post length under 3,000 words ah hah hah…
Remember, you’re a bunch of total f’ing legends. 😀
Undeveloped Bruce 